Whole again
by Belladonna
Summary: Up to the next part in my Jean/Logan romantic storyline. The revelations of "What took you so long"broke him into pieces, so now I've decided to give the third party in this a happy ending. After all I thought he deserved it. Please read and review then.


Whole again

_Disclaimer:_ This is a work of fan-fiction. The here fore used characters belong rightfully to Marvel and I just borrowed them. The only profit I hope to achieve with this is the pure pleasure of the reader, so no copyright infringement intended. Please do not sue me, I don't have money and won't be getting some from this story.

_Author's notes_: This is the next part in my Study in Romance, my Jean/Logan romance storyline and I decided for to give the third party in this a happy ending; I thought he deserved it.

Whole again

_by Belladonna_

The room was dark, a single pale light of the moon that shone above the apartment complex fell onto the bed, but there was no more other light that could lighten up the room. But it was enough for the man who stood there at the window of the room and looked out into the night, up to the stars and up to a moon, he was now able to see with different eyes like he had done recently. The moon had had lost its magic for him when everything in him, his heart and soul had shattered. 

But on this night Scott Summers was able to see the moon again like he had used to see it, how he had always seen it, the moon had gotten its original meaning back for him. He simply stood there at the opened window and glared outside into the dark of the night, the wind caught itself in his hair but that didn't bother Scott tonight, for on this night he felt as happy as he hadn't felt for a long time and in his heart finally peace had found its place again.

~/~

_It is strange how some things are able to change people, have an influence on their whole life, even throw it out its way sometimes. Sometimes it might be only small insignificant things that have this effect, small gestures or words but sometimes it is so much more._

_When I had seen Jean for the first time I have been fascinated of her from this very instant, I have fallen in love with her deep green eyes and lost myself in them, fallen in love with the way she smiled. I still know it well, how my heart had beat so fast, that I thought it would jump right out of my chest when I asked her out for dinner for the first time, I hadn't been able to count the beats then. I knew it from the very first moment that she would be the woman I wanted to spend my life with, the rest of my life at her side and that she would be the one my heart belonged to. Jean had been my first love, she was the one that made me whole, the counterpart to my heart and soul, for when I had been without her, I felt as if a part of me wasn't there, would be missing. I had been the happiest man on earth then, the happiest man one could imagine, I was complete, whole._

_Then came something that would change that life I had for ever, this small thing that was able to throw it out of its way, for then he came into our life._

_I have never known and still do not know what it had been that had made her prefer him instead of me, why she fell in love with him I don't know and probably will never know, maybe I don't want to know after all. But back then it had already been too late, too late for everything._

_I had so much hoped for to be able to win her back, to win her love back but her feelings then belonged already to another – him. I had loved her, I'd given anything for her, if necessary my life but all this probably hadn't been enough._

_I have seen them, in the entrance hall, when they hadkissed and spoken out openly what I had painfully recognized and knew long ago. I had so hoped then that I had been mistaken, that I had made a mistake and that it wasn't true, but in this moment I knew that I only had not wanted to see the bitter truth, the one I now had right in front of my own eyes._

_On that day my heart broke, my life how I knew it shattered in thousand pieces and all that was left, all I still had was only the broken pieces of all that I ever had and wanted for in my life with Jean._

_I could not longer stand it to see them together, to see them together so happily; I know that now and admit it openly. I simply couldn't see their happiness together, a happiness I had wanted for her and me. But not after what I had seen in the hall. _

_I never knew whether they had seen me, whether they had recognized me in the hall but I think so, for their behaviour towards me had also changed afterwards. From that moment on I knew exactly that it would never againbe like it had been before and I simply couldn't stand it. It was, like somebody had ripped my heart out of my chest, torn it into pieces; I wasn't able to stop the pain I felt then, it was the only thing I felt for a long time; the pain that had moved into my heart, in my life and my soul._

_I was broken then and I thought that I would never be able to overtake this pain, that I would never be healed again, whole and I can still feel some of it now, even after so long time._

~/~

Scott Summers looked up to the moon for a last time, then he turned away from the opened window, he'd stood for the past few minutes and glared silently outside into the night. The pale moonlight fell onto the bed and onto the person that lay in it. 

The woman had her eyes closed, her long hair fell loose on the pillow around her beautiful face and some strands onto her forehead. A small smile danced around her full red lips, so as if she must have a very beautiful dream right now, she wished for to never end. The light of the moon, that fell onto her, covered her in a silvery shine and underlined the milky white tone of the skin of her thighs that weren't under the sheets. Scott smiled slightly as he went back to the bed with a few steps and sat down on the sheets. His glare came across an ad in the newspaper, that lay on the night table beside the bed; an ad, that had brought all this back into his thoughts now, all the painful memories he had tried to bury in the farthest corner of his mind. But then his glance wandered further towards the beautiful sleeping lady that lay next to him on the bed. His emotions changed and he smiled happily. This was a moment he never wanted to let it end. In this moment he felt happy and for a long time now he truly was, here in this apartment, with her.

~/~

_For a long time now I am happy again, as happy as I have been before. I would have never thought it possible, but it happened and then when I had never thought it would, when I had expected it the least._

_I don't know whether I would ever return, to the mansion, I really don't know. I don't know whether I could stand it, but today I think that I have come one step closer to the point when I am able to collect all the broken pieces my life lay in for the past time._

_I wish you all the luck in the world, Jean. I wish you that you can hold it and keep it and I hope for you, that you can be happy, truly happy and that you might have found peace and true happiness in and for your heart, too._

~/~

Scott watched the woman next to him and he still smiled. He too had found true happiness for himself, he had found luck again, a luck he had never thought possible. But he had found peace for himself nonetheless, for his heart and soul, for she lay next to him. Scott bend down to her and kissed her softly on her forehead, careful not to wake her.

~/~

_I have thought my life was in pieces, my heart and my soul were torn and broken; I had never thought to be able to love again. I had thought that my heart would have frozen the moment their lips had touched. When I looked up into the skies then, up towards the stars and watched the moon, it reminded me once more too painfully of all I had lost. My heart was ice, all I felt only pain. Never would I have thought it possible that this might change again, I never thought it possible that anything could ever againmake me whole._

_But now, when I look up to the moon, I am able to see heaven again, the heaven that has been closed for me for such a long time, sealed through my own pain. But now I can see heaven again, for I have found the love again, that can open this window for me. I have found someone, who is the counterpart to my heat, who completes me._

_For the first time after a long time I am happy again, as happy as I had never hoped to be again or dreamed of and all this I have found because of her. My life was shattered, my heart broken into pieces but she was able to heal my broken heart._

_I have found true happiness and love again, because of her my life is again how I have always wished for, for because of her I am complete, she made me complete. _

_She made me whole again._

**_~fin~_**


End file.
